Ruth Nieves

After coming home from work, helping with homework, making dinner, baths, snacks and laundry, I actually made it to the gym. When I get home, the dishes are still in the sink, the kids are still awake and the house in in disarray. Before I continue, I need to point out that my wonderful husband does help around the house. He is a wonderful husband and an even greater dad. He was just as tired as I was from a long and exhausting day. Needless to say, I was a "little" upset(to say the least). So, I took off my sneakers and my jacket, rolled up my sleeves and began washing the dishes. As I washed and scrubbed, I grumbled and complained. "I can't believe the dishes aren't done, I mean, come on, I work just as hard. I work outside the home and inside the home and everywhere else and I deserve not to have to do the dishes sometimes"...and on and on and on. As I'm washing my pretty dishes, God interrupted my pity party, my complaining session. And He said, &quo

All I can say is that Sunday was a very difficult day for me...I just could not get into the realm of the praise. My body was in the House but my heart was not there. I kept asking myself, "what is wrong with you, Ruth?" "What's going on?" I couldn't shake it as much as I tried to sing and listen to the amazing words that were being spoken...truths that should have made me leap off of my feet. At one point I began to think way back on things that had been said about me and things that had been done and I became angry, all during the powerful time of praise. Can you believe it? The enemy had latched himself to me and would not get off. I knew right then and there that I was at war! At war with the spiritual realm. At war with the enemy of my joy and soul. I sat there stunned and fighting. And all week, I have felt such a heaviness. A sort of despair, that I have not been able to shake. Praying to God continuously has kept me sane. Knowing that this is a seas

I must say that even in the small things and in the smallest of prayers, God answers. I am continually amazed at the fact that God is concerned about my smallest need and concern. Today, for instance, I took Joey to practice and he was in full gear...helmet, cleats, jersey, shoulder pads...pads all over. And it was hot! As I opened my red chair on the football lawn and sat, I could feel the sweat pouring off of me and I was in capris and a short sleeve shirt. I prayed. I asked the Lord silently in my heart to make the sun go away and make it a little cooler. And almost instantaneous, it did. The sun hid behind a cloud and a nice breeze began to blow. And all I could say was, "thank you, Lord." And then I began to think. And I asked myself(and God), "why aren't all of my prayers answered so quickly." And the answer came just as quickly, "because many times you ask with the wrong motive...Because sometimes my answer is no....because there is a purpose in wait

Reading my last post made even me depressed. But, folks, even I can get down. And I am one that expresses myself best on "paper." There are some of you who are actors. And others write poetry and yet others can simply say what they are feeling. I usually think of my best lines long after the conversation is done. And then I usually want to kick myself for not saying the "cool" line. You know, like in the movies. Last night was a crazy night. Full of all sorts of feelings and emotions. Sorry that you all had to be exposed to it too. I guess that if I am feeling like that then maybe some of you have felt that way too. I am a pretty private person and to expose myself as such made me feel very vulnerable. I guess it's okay to be vulnerable at times. But God continues to love me through these crazy years...ever so patiently. So glad that "He who began a good work in me, will be faithful to complete it." I am a work in progress. I have not arrived yet....no

I guess it has been one of those days...okay, weeks. I have tried not to let it get to me. I have tried to pray it through, talk it through, see it through. And for the most part it has worked. God is truly wonderful and compassionate. As loving, patient and kind as ever...patient. But like Habakkuk I seem to be asking the same question again..."Lord, why?" So much tragedy and chaos in our world. Things seem so unfair. How does one continue? How does one go on? How does one survive? It feels as if there is always something lurking in a corner ready to pounce on an unsuspecting victim. It seems sometimes as if we should always be living on the defensive, living with the "understanding" that tragedy, illness, accidents, losing fingers, warrants, death, pain, tears are a minuscule , a millisecond away. And there is nothing that can be done about it. And yet, how can we live at peace? Can we run free? Laugh without fear or dread? Can we sleep without worry? Can we breat

I must say that I am like most of you out there. I wait and do my own thing when God says do something else. I act like a spoiled brat, with arms crossed across my chest, refusing to give in. I pout and linger, digging my toe in the ground as if He's going to give in to me. Like I know what's really best for me...like I see the big picture. Haven't I been down this road before? Haven't I said, "I will do better next time?" Man, I do try. And I try real hard and yet, I can't seem to get it right. I guess that is the problem right there. I'm the one that is trying. Me. Not God. I want to hold on the the hurts. I want to make my self heard. Yet, God says, "No. Do it my way. It's not the easiest or the most comfortable way, but IT IS the best way." And yet when I find myself struggling and floundering. And yet again make a mess of things...then and only then do I fall on my knees in repentance, asking God to please forgive me and to give me a

What can I say about forgiveness? Well, that I don't do it as quickly as I should. That it is never the first thought that comes to mind when someone hurts me or my family. Actually the very first thing I do think about is...well, maybe I shouldn't say what I think...but I have a strange feeling you just might know. I have a choice to forgive or not to. I can choose to hold on to bitterness and anger. And in choosing not to forgive I have sown unforgiveness in my own life. There are consequences to our actions and the consequences to holding on to offense is not good. Let alone that the word of God says that if we do not forgive then He will not forgive us....that's a BIG OUCH!! So, God, what do I do when someone hurts me? Am I releasing them from the offense? It does not negate the fact that you were hurt, but you are setting yourself free from strife and conflict, stress and bitterness when you do choose to forgive. Living with unforgiveness is not healthy for your mind o

What a wonderful message was heard today at Trinity Church. When God doesn't make sense. When we feel that God isn't listening to our cries or just doesn't care. How many of us out there have at one point or are right now in that season? How many of us have at one time or another cried out to God for peace, for deliverance, for healing for us or a loved one, for God to spare the life of your child and He allows the opposite to happen? WHY, GOD,WHY???? Yet in the book of Habakkuk, God answers Habakkuk after he cries out to God and asks God, Why are good people being taken advantage of? Why are all these bad things happening to good people? Why is it that the wicked appear to prosper while the righteous suffer relentlessly. Almost seems as if those words were written in our times and yet...they were written over 2500 years ago. How true to our times those questions are. When we see a man who has abused his wife and children for years and is a drunk and has cursed God and yet

What can I say?She's my mom. And if you know me, you know my mom. We are the same in some ways and yet very different in others. She had me at the age of fifteen and came to the Main Land with four kids and not speaking one lick of English. Determined to start a better life for herself and her children. She left all that was familiar to her...her family, her friends, her country to escape abuse and pain. Coming to New York she thought that she would encounter something better, only to receive some of the same that she had left. Yet through it all she didn't give up and she definetly did not give us up. Though I am sure that it would've been an easier life for her not to have four children tagging along. She was your typical mom...chancleta (sometimes "la correa) and all. She had our cultural sayings and there was always arroz, habichuelas and pollo frito...she tried to make the best of what was thrown at her. I would see her cry many times but after a good cry she woul

With all the craziness of life...the daily routine, it is so easy to get overwhelmed and side tracked. Man, I find it so easy to lose sight of what is important...laughing with my kids, hugging my husband, sharing with a friend. If you are anything like me, you can close yourself off and not invite people for dinner during the week because with homework, laundry and dinner, you just can't fit one more thing in. How fulfilling it is to break out of THE routine and have friends over for an informal, casual meal. Just simple food with lots of laughs. So what that the kids go to bed a half hour later. They have learned more from the two hours that their friends were over than sleeping for that 1/2 hour. I am a stickler when it comes to schedules and routine, but tonight I discovered that it really is okay to veer from that once in a while. The laundry is still upstairs...waiting. The toys are on the floor...waiting. But my friend and I washed dishes together and laughed. She was much q

When you have tried it all....Stand! When you have cried and pleaded...Stand! When you have yelled and screamed...Stand! When you have prayed and feel like the heavens are like brass...Stand! Stand, immovable, firm, rooted in the truth. The truth that "this too shall pass." That one day you will look back and maybe even laugh at the situation you are now facing. A wonderful story that came to my attention is the story of the Women of Paradise Road. These were the wives of military officers, taken captive by the Japanese in Southeast Asia during WW II. These women were elite and came from affluent and influential heritage. But they were taken and separated from their husbands and children and brutalized, tortured, starved and deprived of civility. Yet somehow they made it. Two years of neglect and death and yet they made it. How? What was it that gave them the strength to endure, to persevere? What was that one thing that made them keep going? They didn't know when help wa

Is true beauty what the world says is true beauty? Is true beauty being thin and flawless ( would be nice, though), having curves in the right places and having just the right amount of cleavage (I wish)? True beauty in the world's standards is a deception, a lie. Why? Because if you speak or ask anyone of the women that grace the covers of any of those magazines or billboards they would tell you that they are anything but perfect. It takes hours to look like that. There is a lot of photo shop going on...masking all of the flaws. There are women all over the world who are altering their appearances, trying to attain a look. They are bleaching their skin, they are rounding out their eyes through surgery. They think that if they can just look a certain way,they can be accepted, affirmed. They believe that if they look a certain way that they will "feel" better about themselves. Yet, many of us know that this just ain't so. True beauty does not come from with "out&q

Last night, I shared on the season's in a woman's life. All of us are in different season's. Many of us have gone through the same or similar seasons as the other. Some of us have raised our children already and are now empty nesters, some of us are just now raising our children. There are some of us who may be going through a divorce or have been widowed. Then some of us may have just received a promotion or gotten a new house or just had a baby. Maybe you are newly married. In every season of our lives there is something to learn. The season, whether painful or joyful is not in vain. It isn't just for us to go through it. We are to learn from it, whatever God may desire, and it is meant to bring comfort to another woman in your life. I have learned that in every season of my life, God has been there. Even when I should have been silent and spoken out of turn to try to get my point across. Verse 7 in Ecclesiastes says, "there is a time to keep silent and a time to

What is a warrior chick? Well, I am a warrior chick. I am a warrior chick because I am a fighter, a warrior. Why? Because I live. I live in a world where as a woman, I wear many hats. I wear the hat of a wife, a mom, a sister, a daughter. I wear the hat of a pastor's wife, a friend, a counselor. I also wear the hat of a christian, an employee. There are some battles I have chosen and there are some battles I have been drafted into. I chose to be a mom and a wife. The battles fought in these two roles have been hard. I have been hit the hardest as a mom and wife. But I did not choose to lose my son, I did not choose that battle, that loss. And though it was a devastating blow, I chose not to stay down. I chose to rise up. Did I want to rise up? Many days, no. But I had to make a choice. Live defeated and down or rise up and fight. I chose to rise up and fight. Fight for my right to believe in a God who really does love me. Despite what was being whispered in my ear. You cannot throw