Skip to main content

Every Woman's Battle

I am guessing that right about now you are wondering which battle am I referring to. Being that we battle so many of them on a daily basis. As a woman, as a mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend...we experience challenges and trials of all kinds and at different levels. I am struggling once again with this thing called "fear." Something I struggled with all of my life. Afraid of things that I have no control over. Not being able to sleep or relax, always being on alert. Having no peace or true joy. I find myself wondering why am I dealing with this again...after many years of freedom? As I sat last night asking God this very question, God softly and gently let me in on a little secret. What He revealed to me was a child walking with her father in a beautiful forest. He is pointing out some really beautiful things that he wants to share with her. After a little while, she begins to wander off, alone. She is distracted by a bird here and a beautiful butterfly over there...and slowly but surely she is alone, wondering where her father is. Scared, confused and alone she begins trying to get out of that forest alone, she does everything in her power to get out, everythings but scream. Finally when she has exhausted all effort she finally sits down, heart pounding, and yells out her father's name. Quickly he answers her and recovers her. Sadly and ironically, God points out that the little girl is me. I am easily distracted by the things in my life. All good and honorable things. Taking care of my husband and children, tending to the house. Helping and serving in the church. Working. Wandering. Losing focus on the One who gives me health, energy, peace and joy in every circumstance. Like a child letting go of her father's hand and wandering off. You would think that after 21 years of walking with God and serving Him that I would have this down. I mean, being a pastor's wife and "living" in the church gives me an innie with God and with the supernatural that no other woman has. Right!(Not even close) How I wish that were true...yet, how untrue that is. I finally called out to my Father. Realizing that I had wandered away, wandered off. God in His love and mercy for me, extended His arm, grabbed me and pulled me out. There is no greater love than this.
He uses so many things to speak to us. Last night He used His word, the Bible to speak to me. It had been days that I hadn't slept soundly and it was wearing on me...and my husband(and he says amen to that!). As I read, as huge spiritual "highlighter" highlighted the verse from Psalm 4:8..."I will lie down and sleep in peace, for You alone, O, Lord, keep me (and my loved ones-I added this) safe." How amazing He is. I had quoted that verse to my boys for days and days and now my Father was quoting it back to me. I wept at His love for me. Knowing that He DOES know me and is concerned with all that concerns me.
Whatever is bothering you or threatening your health and sanity...turn to your Father, your God, who loves you more than you could ever know. He desires to grab you and pull you out of the hole you are in. He doesn't want to leave you there. He doesn't want to see you afraid and confused. He wants to see the beautiful smile he created for your face and wants to see you free and happy. But He knows that unless you turn to Him and call out to Him, you won't experience that freedom you so desire. Just do it. Just call out to Him. He will answer. He will be right there waiting...as He has always been.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Simple Country Life...My Goal

No, I haven't grown up in the country. I actually grew up in Brooklyn, New York. Born in San Juan, Puerto Rico, but grew up in the greatest city on this earth...New York! Maybe because of the hustle and bustle and the taking of the buses and trains every single day, the constant going that as I grew older I wanted to retreat to a quieter, slower pace. I live not too far from NYC right now. So I do have the perks of Broadway, Rockefeller Center, amazing restaurants, Lincoln Center, Metropolitan Museum of Art, and the list is endless. I absolutely love it! But when I have had quite enough of all the fabulousness, I love to go home to my little house on the prairie in the beautiful Hudson Valley. I live in between horse farms overlooking amazing mountains and lakes. My little house is just that, little. But it is the right place for this season. With the boys growing up we will need a bigger place before long. So pray that the right home becomes available soon. But for now our 160...
2 comments
Read more

2011

I have so much to say and it's all jumbled in my head. Don't you hate when that happens? Often times, my mouth goes before my thoughts and then I get in big trouble. But tonight as I sit here and write I have so much to say and yet I can't seem to put it to "paper." This year has brought a lot of growth. With it's often chaotic times, it has brought peace and learning. If you are a woman, let alone a wife and mom, pastor's wife of the best church in Orange County, NY, school volunteer(when I remember to get there), sports mom, counselor, teacher, hostess, and the list goes on, then you know what I am talkin' about. And when I plop into bed at night(and yes, I do plop...more than you know!) I look back at my day, my week and God speaks to me in a still small voice and shows me areas that I need work in, and people I need to ask forgiveness from and those I need to forgive. He tells me to be a little easier on my boys and don't say "no" so...
Post a Comment
Read more

Thoughts

Can I say that I am so happy that today is Wednesday? This means that the weekend is near and I get to chill and spend some time with my husband and kids, uninterrupted. I can also spend some quality time with my pillow. Don't you just feel like that sometimes? Just act like being a lump on a log? I am also so sore. Doing the Crossfit regiment 5 days a week takes a toll on this 40+ body of mine. Love the way I look and feel, but man does it tire out this middle-aged woman (I can't believe I just said that!! Did I really just say that?!). Am I considered "middle-aged?" I'll jump on the band wagon and say that 40 is the new 30. Hey, it works. Denial isn't so bad sometimes...muahahahaha... I've been enjoying the fall thus far. Loving the brisk mornings and nights. The spicy scents of pumpkin candles and pumpkin lattes. I think I posted this before but here goes, "If you can't beat the Fall then you gotta join it." So I've decorated the hou...
Post a Comment
Read more